11/5 2011

Posted in:  Books and articles, Communication Behaviors, Servant Leadership

As many of you may know I am completing my master’s degree from Gonzaga and my thesis is focused to how leaders influence the process of restoring justice.  We as leaders have a responsibility to build a stronger sense of community within our organizations.  It is imperative that we seek opportunities to heal relationships (not just within our organizations, but also in other parts of our lives as well). When we are building community we are building strong social capital.  My favorite writer about community is Peter Block.  According to Block, “If we want to change the community, all we have to do is change the conversation.  The shift in conversation is from one of problems, fear and retribution to one of possibility, generosity and restoration” (Block, 2009, p. 31). 

But what are some simple behaviors that we can start doing differently that will change our conversations?  Here is a short list (which will be expanded on as we go).

1. Don’t badmouth other departments and talk about what they are doing wrong.  Have productive conversations directly with the specific people rather than talking negatively about an entire department.
2. Allow others to finish their thoughts and do not interrupt them with your own ideas.  Hear them out.
3. Ask questions.  We are too quick to defend our own position and we need to keep more of an open mind and ask questions to dig deeper before we start making judgments.
4. Identify how your facial expressions are perceived by others.  We don’t realize how much of what is in our hearts actually comes out on our face.  Be sensitive to frowning, rolling of the eyes and looking away from those who are talking.
5. Reach out and invite people into your office for difficult conversations instead of waiting for them to approach you.  Be the first to extend your hand.
6. Be the first to apologize for a misunderstanding.  Don’t expect the other person to apologize.  Go into the forgiveness with no expectations for anything in return.
7. Acknowledge the feelings of others instead of just wanting to tell your side of the story.  It goes a long way to say, “That must have been really difficult for you to go through”.  Don’t change the subject to focus on yourself.  Keep asking questions and focus on the needs of the other person instead of your own needs or agenda.

As leaders we need to look at a big part of our role as building a stronger sense of community within the walls of our companies and that also extend outside of our walls.  This concept of building community is what takes “respecting diversity” to the highest concept.  So you are teaching your employees to respect diversity, but are your reinforcing and creating a culture that builds community?

MOMENT OF REFLECTION
What am I doing to reach out and heal relationships so that we can move forward toward a more positive future? 

Block, P. (2009). Community: the structure of belonging. San Francisco, CA: Berrett-Koehler.

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